So, I’m reading this book called “Miracle Morning” by Hal Elrod. Spoiler alert: It’s about a man who gets into a car accident caused by a drunk driver during a high point in his young adult life. His injuries are so severe that he is pronounced dead at one point. He ends up recovering, all the while beating insurmountable odds, only to go into a deep depression after the market crash of 2008 struck. After his wreck, he began a successful business as a life coach and business advisor. He was engaged to his soul mate and seemed to be on top of the world, when like so many others, he was on the verge of losing it all- again. He claims bouncing back from the brink of death was easier than being broke and depressed, because when you are sick people help you and bring you food. When you are broke and scared, you’re on your own and when a crises happens like the 2008 market crash, most people have their own troubles to contend with.
I’m not even half way through the book yet, and I don’t want to divulge what the “Miracle Morning” entails, so I’ll just focus on one main point that he drives home in the book. That is- if we really want to live the life of our dreams we have to stop settling for mediocrity, or “average.”
Over a year ago, I had a bit of an epiphany. I thought if the average American is depressed, overweight, sleep-deprived and in debt, how can I avoid it? Better yet, how can I thrive? The simple answer ( note, not the easy answer) is don’t live like the average American.
If the average American spends beyond their means and has minimal to no savings, I had to take a hard look at where my money goes. Yes, I make decent money for what I do and I’m married to an engineer, but that did not mean automatic security/stability because, like so many others, we were spending too much. We bought my husband’s car brand new (big no-no), we bought an H-vac system for our house (spending double what we should have), we bought a motorcycle, we purchased surround sound speakers for top dollar that are now damaged by our precious felines, and the list of financial mishaps was growing. Nowadays, we live more of anti-consumerist lifestyle, meaning we only spend money on things that are really important to us: trips to see family, a new mattress, quality food, etc. I’m still driving a 14 year old car I wrecked two years ago because it runs perfectly. The front room of our house has no furniture in it because at some point the absurdity of buying furniture I’d never use sunk it. Often times, financial freedom has more to do with how we spend than what we make. Think about it, how many times when we get a raise or bonus of some sort (tax refund?) do we then raise our standard of living instead of saving or investing it? I don’t claim to be a financial expert, far from it, but most of us can likely do better in this area if we are willing. If you are the exception to the rule, focus on other areas that seem more attainable.
The average American doesn’t cook often, if at all. Here’s another area where I was also spending too much. My health/weight wasn’t where I wanted it to be,but I was doing it no favors by eating out and not knowing where my food was coming from, or for that matter, what was in it. Getting diagnosed with a gluten allergy certainly was a catalyst for change, but so was bettering my health in general. Now I get a lot of my food from a local farm and farmer’s markets. My husband and I will make dinner together and light candles and set the table as if we were at a fancy restaurant. Throw in an inexpensive bottle of wine, and life is good! I also prepare my lunches on my days off for the week to come. I haven’t touched fast food in years, and you know what? I don’t miss it. Especially when I found that in a McDonald’s strawberry milkshake not only are there no strawberries to be found, but there are about fifty different man-made chemicals added to create a strawberry flavor. What are McDonald’s and other fast food chains adding to all their other foods? I’d rather not chance it.
The average American is sleep-deprived. This one really gets me fired up! I was always the first to forgo sleep for the promise of a caffeinated beverage to get my pistons firing in the morning. It didn’t help that I have an early morning job, sometimes having to clock in at 4am. Nowadays, it’s Starbucks, 5Hour Energy and a plethora of Monster energy tonics to get us revved up on minimal to no sleep. But is that the answer? And what are the consequences to living this way? Sleep is when our bodies heal and regenerate. It regulates appetite and hormone levels. It helps stave of illness and as many of us can attest to, lack of sleep does us no favors in the mood department. I kind of compare forgoing sleep to forgoing quality food- we will pay for it eventually, and with our health. Quality, unprocessed foods are pricey indeed, but at some point if we don’t make that investment in our health, we pay for it with cancer, MS, diabetes, heart disease etc. And treating those conditions is anything but cheap! When we forgo sleep, we deplete our adrenals which wrecks our immune system leaving us more vulnerable to mood disorders and the ailments I just linked to poor diet ( and then some.) Now I know I’m sounding like Debbie Downer here, but the beauty in all of this is that we decide whether or not to make sleep a priority and work on fixing the problem as opposed to treating the symptom. In my next blog post I will address my personal battle with sleep deprivation and how I’m overcoming it, because I know this is a complicated issue for many and it should not be trivialized, but it can be done!
And finally, the average American works a job they don’t like and has given up on doing something that fuels their passion/ creativity. I remember watching an episode of Oprah many moons ago where she stated that when you find what you’re meant to do, it no longer becomes “work.” This one is tough because I can’t quit my job to be a ballerina- well, I could, but it certainly wouldn’t pay the bills, and would inevitably result in me flopping about in my basement to Mozart without any fanfare or critical acclaim. But I love to write. My dream is to make a living writing my blog and to win a Grammy for songwriting. Maybe I can’t quit my job just yet, but I can get the ball rolling. I’m not a kid anymore, but I’m not dead either, so why give up on my dreams? That is why I started this blog last year. As adults we have to be practical, we have families to support and bills to pay. But why does that have to mean putting our passions on the back burner or giving up on them entirely? Most people do, and that to me, is too depressing to fathom.
I want to clarify that I don’t think I’m better than the average American- hell, for most of my life I was the average American. However, I do feel there’s a lot to be learned and improved upon in regards to how our society typically functions. I don’t want to settle for mediocrity and frankly, I hope you don’t either:)