My book is currently being edited, and I’ve decided to self publish through Amazon. That is the brief synopsis of where things currently stand in regards to my much (self) hyped memoir.
It’s funny, because a year ago I never would’ve considered self publishing. I was under the (false) impression that that meant my book wasn’t good enough to be taken on by a major publisher. I told myself that only people with subpar, low-quality material (at least in terms of memoirs) have to resort to such measures. Pretty bold thinking for someone who had only been published once before, and I had to pay for the honor out of pocket! I had entered a poetry contest, and was elated to hear I’d been “selected” for the book Aspirations of Pen and Thought – all I had to do was send $50 for each copy I wanted (I bought three), and within a few months I had proof that I was, in fact, a published poet. At least they were decent quality. Truth be told, I’m damn lucky there even was a book! Admittedly, that was around the time I also bought some speakers from two sketchy dudes out of the back of a van. In my defense, I was nineteen and many poor life choices were made.
But I digress.
Upon completing my book, I’d had a legit connection with someone in the business. Unfortunately, that connection fell through, and I had to then send out query letters to various literary agents. Query letters are essentially a one page summary of your book and credentials. Initially, I sent out three to three separate agents. Months went by with no response. The real mindfuck of it all, is that you don’t know if the deafening tone of crickets is due to the agents rejecting you, or if they simply never read them to begin with. I should note, my “connection” had warned me not to bother with query letters because “No one reads them and they’re a waste of time.” Possibly sound advice, but what choice did I have?
Then one night, an email popped up in my inbox. It was Margaret Riley King- Glennon Doyle’s agent! These were her exact words: “I have now had the opportunity to review your query, and I’m afraid I’m not the right person to represent this project. Since your work so richly deserves the energetic and passionate representation that I can’t offer you, I will step aside for an agent who can and undoubtedly will. I wish you the best of luck and much success.” I mean, can you ask for a nicer rejection? I’ve never been more pleasantly disappointed in my entire life!
The next day I had an appointment with my therapist. When I told him about Margaret’s email, his face lit up. Apparently he’d gone to a wedding days before, and the father of the bride had just published his own book through Amazon.
Right then, it all made sense. The option of being able to make my dream happen now, instead of waiting around for someone to deem me worthy, was absolutely the way to go! Also, self publishing gives me full creative control and ownership of my work, along with the perk of receiving higher royalties. However, it is also more expensive to self publish; I will be lucky to break even, but money isn’t the reason I wrote my memoir- the intention has always been to help people.
Additionally, self publishing falls in line with everything I believe about finding your own power in any situation- especially when you feel as though things are happening to you and not for you.
Ms. King’s words were essentially a sign encouraging me not to give up, and self publishing was the catalyst to keeping hope alive. So, now the future of my book is all up to me, and I reside in an amalgamation of confusion, frustration, and mostly, excitement.
In conclusion- it’s called humble pie folks, and for me, it’s best served consistently;)